Ready Or Not
by Sam285
Summary: A difficult case forces Amy and PJ to delve into the sinister past of Amy's family and brings a new beginning into their lives. This is my oldest Blue Heelers fic from late 2005.
1. Chapter 1

**Ready Or Not**

Disclaimer: anything you recognise belongs to Southern Star and Channel Seven.

Summary: A difficult case delving into the sinister past of Amy's family brings a new beginning into her life and PJ's.

**Part 1**

_He knew_, Amy thought, _he knew all along and never told me. He knew what Uncle John was doing…and he didn't do a thing to stop it._

These thoughts swam through Amy's head, and she wasn't happy with them. If there was ever a time she didn't want to be thinking, it was now. The only thing that ran through her mind were outraged thoughts that Brendan had known all along yet hadn't done a thing to stop it. He had let it go on night after night for years…

PJ was being the most patient being on earth, Amy realised, as she looked up from her unfinished report and cast him a glance. He too appeared engrossed in unfinished paperwork, but spared a moment to meet her gaze. Amy flushed and looked down again.

Last night had been something completely different for Amy. She had never gotten that close to another human being since she had dated Garth, and even so, that had only extended to hand holding and five second hugs.

Yet, for some reason, Amy had let PJ hold her for a while. She had let him comfort her in what she realised was one of her darker hours. He had always cared for her so much…like a brother or father even.

Amy almost scolded herself for thinking of PJ as a father. Every 'father' she had ever had had ended up letting her down or abandoning her. Her father had died in that car crash…her uncle had abused her and violated her…and even Garth had run a mile.

But PJ hadn't…he was still here.

"Hey, PJ…Foxy," a voice said as the door opened. Amy looked up, but she didn't need to. She already knew who it was. Only one person called her Foxy.

"Yeah, Alex?" PJ asked as he sat back in his chair, lacing his fingers behind his head.

"There's been an assault. Guy's at the hospital. Thought you might like to know." Alex said as he peered through the door.

PJ nodded and cast Amy a glance. Their eyes met and Amy sighed.

"We're on it," she said.

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Amy yawned as she sat in the passenger seat of PJ's car while he drove them to the hospital. He looked at her out of the corner of his eye.

"You okay, Amy?" he asked in a concerned voice. Amy looked over and forced a smile.

"Didn't sleep well last night," she admitted. "I kept thinking of Brendan."

PJ tapped his fingers on the steering wheel and turned a corner.

"He was a kid himself…he didn't know what to do about it…he probably didn't want to believe it. But, all that aside, it's not your fault. That whole part of your family are jerks. Not one of them is worth your tears." PJ told her with that tone that always made Amy feel warm, comfortable and appreciated.

"I've heard that so many times, but I still don't quite believe it." Amy responded as she leant against the window with tears in her eyes.

PJ placed a hand on her knee and gave it a small squeeze as they pulled into the hospital car park.

"Some day, Amy, just maybe…you'll learn that it's the truth," PJ finished as he parked the car and climbed out. "Now let's go see our assault victim."

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Heading back into the station, PJ glanced back to Amy, who seemed highly volatile. PJ rushed Amy into their office without a word to the others. Even Alex's call of 'Foxy' went unheard.

"Sit," PJ instructed, and Amy did so. She looked up at him with tears in her eyes. She resembled a young child. "Now, Amy, I need you to hold it together."

"He's my cousin," Amy interrupted. "Something's going on, and Brendan won't talk to me. Why did he keep telling me not to get involved?"

PJ placed his hands on Amy's shoulders and gripped them tightly.

"I don't know, but we'll find out. Now, I really think you should take yourself off the case."

"Why does everyone tell me that?" Amy shouted in hysterics. PJ pulled Amy into a hug, despite her struggling. Finally Amy stopped resisting and started crying into PJ's shirt. After several minutes, PJ placed a hand under Amy's chin and rose her face so they looked into each other's eyes.

That was when, just with their eyes, a mutual decision was made. They both closed their eyes gently and their lips brushed lightly. They came apart far enough so Amy could take in PJ's expression. It was like a heavy weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He wanted this…he had wanted it for such a long time. And, the truth was, she had as well.

"I think I'm ready," Amy whispered and PJ smiled.

And they kissed again, this time more passionately than before.


	2. Chapter 2

**Part 2**

Amy finally broke away from PJ as she heard the door open. They turned with a start to face Tom Croydon, who was eyeing them with uncertainty. He appeared to have realised that he had walked in on a tender moment, and seemed slightly embarrassed.

"Uh…Fox…Hasham…what happened with your…uh…assault victim?" Tom asked as he tried to make the conversation professional. Amy stood up and straightened the creases in her dark coloured skirt.

"Well…you see…" Amy began, but PJ interrupted.

"We're making inquiries and have the entire situation under control." PJ said, and Amy looked to him with slight surprise.

"We do?" she asked him under her breath. PJ glanced at her out of the corner of his eyes and nodded ever so slightly. "Uh…yeah…we do, Boss." Amy said, trying to find conviction in her voice. "Everything is under control."

Tom seemed sceptical and looked from Amy to PJ with doubt, but could find nothing to say.

"Well…I guess I'll be…going," Tom said as he left, clearly uncomfortable with what he had walked in on. As he closed the door, he paused and shook his head. Couldn't anyone in this station keep their minds on the job?

Once Tom was gone, PJ let out the breath he had been holding and looked to Amy with a slightly cheeky smile on his face.

"Well, that was…" he began.

"Why didn't you tell him the victim was Brendan?" Amy snapped as she turned to face him. "You know we don't have this under control at all. What on earth made you say that?"

PJ held Amy's shoulders again, rooting her to the spot.

"Look…you said you didn't want to be taken off the case…and you're the only one who ever seems to get through to that family of yours," he explained.

"But what'll the Boss do when he finds out?" Amy asked in a concerned voice.

"Let's cross that bridge when we get to it…shall we?" PJ said as he hugged Amy again. She sighed and began to cry into his shoulder again. "Hey…I said your family aren't worth a single tear, remember?"

Amy nodded and let PJ hold her. She rested the side of her head on PJ's shoulder and remained that way for quite a while. She closed her eyes gently and began to breathe slower as she calmed down.

_I don't deserve him_, Amy thought as she let PJ gently rock her, _I don't deserve something this perfect, loving, gentle and kind. Something's wrong…it has to be…_

_----------------------------------------------------_

After what felt like the longest day in history, yet the most perfect, it was finally knock-off time and Amy was heading out to her car. She paused partway there, just to reflect on things. She remembered months ago when she had gone out to dinner with Bill Lapscott. That had been the closest she had ever come to a guy since Garth. Amy thought about how close she had come to Bill, and compared it to her feelings for PJ. There was no comparison.

Amy unlocked her car and dumped her bag in on the passenger seat. As she climbed in, she saw PJ exit the station. Her eyes lit up as she fixed her gaze on him…he of the kindest heart…

She let a smile light up on her face. Tears filled her eyes as she realised that he was her's…and that she was his.

_I am unworthy_, Amy thought, _I am unworthy of his affections. Of every woman in the world, he picked me. He loves me…_

"Hey! PJ!" Amy called and PJ looked up from his car. A similar smile spread across his face and their eyes met. Amy giggled slightly and watched with excitement as he walked over to her.

"Why, hello, Amy," he said as he placed a hand on the open car door. "You think you'll be right to get home?"

Amy laughed.

"Yeah, I'll get home fine to my little flat where I'll probably end up watching a movie and eating a pizza." Amy answered as she turned so her right shoulder rested against the seat and the side of her head was against the headrest.

"Well…I'll end up eating takeaway in front of the TV." PJ said as he began to tap his fingers on the door. His gaze travelled to them fleetingly before returning to Amy. "And Jonesy and Alex will probably start with the twenty questions."

Amy's smile became one that would melt the heart of any man within the vicinity. PJ beamed at her and their eyes met.

"Maybe…" Amy began, at the same moment that PJ opened his mouth to speak.

"You go first," PJ offered and Amy blushed. It was obvious to PJ that she was very inexperienced in asking a guy out, and it was no wonder why. As he watched the normally very organised Amy gather her thoughts, he realised that any relationship with Amy would have to go very slowly, and be built on rock-solid foundations of trust.

She would need to know she could trust him before they could ever take the next step.

"Would you like to come to my place for dinner?" Amy asked. She didn't sound entirely sure, but PJ knew that she wouldn't be entirely sure about anything to do with their relationship.

PJ nodded. He didn't even need to think about it.

"It'll only be Chinese," Amy pointed out, "is that okay with you?"

He laughed and planted a light kiss on Amy's cheek.

"For you, I'd eat the dirt from the ground."

Amy seemed slightly taken aback.

"Do us all a favour, PJ, and don't."

_----------------------------------------------------_

Amy straightened any creases from her black dress and looked around her small flat. PJ would be getting there at any moment, and everything had to be perfect. At the moment, things were a little messy. Last night, after finding out that Brendan had known about the abuse, she had thrown things around and screamed until the neighbours had come by to complain.

"This is a pigsty," she told herself as she knelt down to pick up some of the rubbish she had thrown from the bin.

Just as Amy was standing up to put the rubbish in the bin, the doorbell rang and the loot was almost spilled again.

"Damn," Amy cursed under her breath as she dumped the lot in the nearest drawer, kicked as much junk out of sight as she could and fixed her hair for the last time. She opened the door and fixed PJ with the most relaxed smile she could manage, which really only passed for mildly stressed.

"Hello, hello, hello," PJ said as he passed her, kissing her cheek again. Amy blushed and watched as PJ headed into the flat. He seemed a little taken aback by the messiness, but simply placed the Chinese on the table and sat a couple of bottles of wine next to them.

"Smells nice," Amy commented as she came over and sat down. PJ sat across from her and rummaged through the plastic bags as he pulled out the food.

Amy's mind began to wander to a few years back, when she was still living in Melbourne, and she was going out with Garth.

She recalled deciding to cook dinner for him, and deciding to tell him about the abuse. After four attempts to cook something even slightly non-poisonous, she had given up and ordered Chinese. She remembered that she had spent the whole day cleaning her flat, and doing everything in her power to impress Garth…but it still hadn't stopped him from leaving her…

"Amy?"

Amy was snapped back to reality as PJ tapped his hand on the table.

"Yeah?" she asked, a little dazed.

"Your food's going to be cold," he explained. PJ took a bottle of wine and poured two glasses. He handed one to Amy, who sat it down on the table before her. PJ took a sip and smiled at Amy.

Amy smiled back and began to eat, but she really wasn't tasting the food. She was lost in PJ's kindness and love.

_Maybe this is what true happiness feels like_, she thought, and dug in.

_----------------------------------------------------_

PJ wiped his mouth with a serviette and met Amy's eyes. She was pouring herself a second glass of wine. As Amy finished filling her's, PJ's took it's place. Amy smiled broadly and pretend-slapped his arm.

"Lazy," Amy said playfully as she corked the bottle and handed it to PJ. He laughed as he took it and filled himself a second glass. The two headed over to the couch, which faced Amy's small TV set.

The two sat for a while, contenting themselves with the other's company. Every now and again, Amy would look up and meet PJ's eyes, and wonder how she had managed to get the perfect man into her life. He was strong…yet not hot headed. He was protective…yet not smothering. He was gentle…yet not weak. He was the guy of every girl's dreams!

Amy sipped her glass of wine and looked into PJ's eyes.

"What is love?" she asked him curiously. PJ seemed taken aback by the question and rose an eyebrow.

"Love is, uh…damn it, Amy, stop asking me impossible questions," PJ said as he placed an arm around her shoulders. "Well…it's hard to explain. I suppose when you feel it…you just know."

Amy lay against PJ and finished her glass of wine. She sighed and held the glass between her thumb and index finger as she began to wonder.

_Thing is_, she thought, _I don't know._


	3. Chapter 3

**Part 3**

Amy awoke the next morning, feeling groggy and slow. She yawned and rolled onto her side…only to see a blue shirt on the floor nearby. Amy's eyes narrowed in confusion as she regarded it.

"That's not mine…" Amy mumbled under her breath as she slowly pushed herself up. Clutching her blanket to her body, she turned to see a male figure lying in the bed next to her, bare chested.

Amy swore under her breath as she looked at him and took in a deep breath. At first, she couldn't understand who was beside her, but finally realised that it was none other than PJ.

"PJ!" Amy hissed. "PJ! Senior Detective PJ Hasham, wake the hell up!"

PJ stirred slowly and rolled onto his side. His eyes opened wide and fast as he realised Amy was there.

"Oh, God," PJ mumbled as he sat up and met Amy's eyes. "Oh, God…Amy!"

Amy climbed out of bed and grabbed her dressing gown, pulling it tightly around her. She bent down, picked up PJ's shirt and threw it at him. PJ caught it and put it down on the bed beside him.

Amy began to pace, her mind spinning with thoughts she wasn't at all comfortable with. She kept her arms folded across her chest and her gaze lowered.

PJ followed her with his eyes.

"Stop pacing, Amy, you're making me dizzy," he said. Amy stopped and faced him, her eyes filled with tears of panic and regret. "Come on…maybe nothing happened."

Amy didn't respond. She just broke down into tears. PJ couldn't resist it…he raced over and pulled Amy into his arms. She beat against his chest for several minutes, shouting loudly. The more Amy shouted, the tighter PJ held her.

Finally, Amy stopped shouting or fighting against PJ's hold. Instead, she revelled in it. She let herself be overcome by his empathy, strength and kindness. She sobbed in his arms and let his love rush through her veins.

_He loves me_, Amy realised as an emotion she was unfamiliar with rushed through her, _he really loves me…_

That day, Amy found focusing on police work to be next to impossible. She couldn't help but gaze at PJ, and wonder what he saw in her. Beneath her scars…beneath her past…what was it exactly that PJ had found?

Amy sighed lovingly, and PJ looked up from his half-hearted attempt at a report that he should have finished weeks ago. Their eyes met, and expressions softened. Amy would have been the happiest woman alive if she could have just remained that way forever…

The phone rang, snapping Amy to reality. She almost jumped into the air from the surprise, and the expression on PJ's face told her that he had just received the same jolt. He picked up the receiver and sat back in his seat.

"Mount Thomas CI, Senior Detective Hasham speaking," he said, making eye contact with Amy. Amy leant forward over her desk and rested her chin in her hands as PJ spoke. The smile on her face faded fairly quickly as PJ's expression fell. "What? We'll be there in ten…yeah, bye."

"What's wrong?" Amy said, before PJ had even hung up. PJ kept his gaze on the phone for several moments before meeting Amy's concerned gaze.

"Someone's trying to assault Brendan at the hospital," he explained gently, "maybe you should stay…"

Amy stood up quickly and headed to the door.

"No way, I'm coming."

"Alright, get off him," PJ shouted as he burst into Brendan McGuire's hospital room. A fairly beaten up looking Brendan was in a sitting position and fending a fairly bulky man off of him.

"About time you got here…Amy…" Brendan said, and his expression grew worried as he noticed Amy entering the room and grabbing Brendan's attacker with PJ.

PJ and Amy held the man as he struggled to get at Brendan. He had flaming red hair that fell to his shoulders and glinting green eyes. His bulk made keeping him under control difficult for PJ and Amy.

"Let me go, you pigs!" the man shouted. "I said, get off me!"

"Not until you've calmed down, mate," PJ said calmly. Amy nodded, namely for her own benefit, and shook her head to move the hair from her eyes. She met PJ's gaze and, for the first time, no comfort was found there.

Amy sat down in the interview room, while PJ closed the door.

"Interview commencing at 10:05am with Senior Detective Hasham and Detective Senior Constable Fox present." PJ said, and the man groaned.

"Why the hell did you bring me in for?" he shouted. "If you want to speak to anyone, talk to that jerk McGuire!"

PJ sat down beside Amy and leant over the table.

"Look, mate…why did you attack Brendan McGuire? Personal vendetta?"

The man, Luke Phillips, leant back and folded his arms. Amy eyed him suspiciously. She had definitely taken a personal disliking to him. He gave her shivers down her spine, in a way that not many criminals had done before him. She kept her gaze fixed on him the whole time, not looking away once to even shoot PJ a glance.

"That McGuire is an idiot…speak to him," Luke said, in his cold and steely voice.

"I'm afraid that we aren't interested in what Mr McGuire has to say at the moment," PJ replied, "we want to know your side of the story."

Luke glanced up at them, at the very same moment that a fairly large woman and Tom burst in.

"Lukey!" the woman cried and Luke glanced over at her.

"Mum, you moron!" he shouted, jumping up. "I don't need you here."

Tom glared at Amy and PJ and approached them.

"Why the hell didn't you tell me that the assault victim was Brendan McGuire?"


	4. Chapter 4

**Part 4**

Tom closed the door and glared at the two detectives. He sat down behind his desk and sat back, lacing his fingers behind his head. He surveyed Amy and PJ with his usual cool attitude, before finally speaking.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he demanded in his usual rash and bitter voice.

PJ went to speak, probably to save face for Amy, but she cut in.

"Technically," she said, "we don't have to answer to you. If we believe that my being on the case will assist us in our enquires, then I will be on the case. It's our decision, not yours."

Amy and PJ could tell that Tom wanted to say something…he had that look in his eyes…but reason appeared to have stopped him, for all he said was: "Get out of my office."

Walking out, Amy cast PJ a glance. The two ignored the uniforms as they headed back into their office and closed the door.

"Brendan McGuire's got to be involved in something," Amy whispered as she sat down at her computer. PJ let his smile fade as Amy became serious and joined her. "And this something must involve me or something…otherwise, why would he tell me not to get involved?"

PJ draped his arms around Amy's shoulders in an attempt to comfort her, but she merely struggled against him.

"Not now, PJ," she said. Staring at the blank computer screen, Amy tried to think. Finally, she spun to face PJ with such a speed that he almost jumped backwards. "I think we need to have another chat to Brendan."

PJ sat down at his own computer and folded his arms.

"What?" he asked. "Another interview? I fail to see the point, really."

Amy shook her head, her expression still serious.

"No…just a cousin-to-cousin chat."

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"I'll be right outside if you need anything…okay?" PJ said and watched as Amy headed into the hospital room to speak to Brendan. He placed a caring hand on her arm, but Amy shook it off.

"No, PJ," she said warningly, and PJ's expression fell quickly. He drew his hand away as if it had been burnt, and let her go in without further action.

Brendan was sitting up in bed when Amy walked in, and horror filled his face.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" he shouted. "Stay away from us…all of us…he'll get you too."

Amy watched as Brendan grabbed her arm in a desperate appeal.

"Believe me," he said in a desperate voice, "I'm only trying to protect you."

She shook him off and glared at him coldly.

"Nonsense, Brendan, you've never wanted, let alone tried, to protect me before. Why would this be any different? Why should I believe you now?"

Brendan's eyes appealed to Amy's kinder nature. Part of her wanted with all her heart to trust him and believe every word he said, but she still very doubtful.

_How can I know_, she wondered, _how can I ever know if he's telling me the truth…_

"Luke Phillips is a very dangerous man…and his mother's even worse. See these injuries? He caused them…he's going to hurt Chloe if you don't back off…he's going to hurt you." Brendan said, indicating to a bandage wrapped thickly around his forearm.

Amy folded her arms across her chest and regarded Brendan with mixed emotions. Her mind couldn't twist itself around what she was being told…Sure, she could believe someone wanting to hurt Brendan…but what business did Luke Phillips have with Chloe?

"Give me one good reason why I should take anything you say seriously," Amy finally said, breaking the uneasy silence which had fallen between them. "Just one good reason, Brendan, and PJ and I will leave this case alone…it's not that hard, Brendan."

Brendan tried to speak, but words caught in his throat.

"I'm your cousin," he decided upon finally, but the words didn't have quite the effect he had hoped for.

Amy's eyes still remained as doubtful as ever, and she turned to leave.

"That wasn't enough for you to tell about the abuse," she said finally and closed the door quietly behind her.

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Once outside, Amy began to sob quietly into her hand. PJ watched her with concern as they walked, wishing he could say something to make everything fine again, but every word he considered was almost immediately dismissed.

The car ride back to the station was a silent one, with PJ still trying to determine what to say to Amy. She was inconsolable, as he had expected her to be after every time she ever saw a member of her family.

PJ kept his eyes fixed on Amy for a long moment, wishing that, even for a second, she could see the bright colours that he saw in her. Beneath the battle-worn exterior of Amy Fox gleamed a bright and beautiful young woman with the world before her. The problem was that Amy didn't know this.

Amy looked up slowly, and her eyes filled with panic.

"PJ!" she shouted. "Watch out!"

PJ turned back to the road quickly to see a cream ute approaching them at a very high speed. He had a moment of wonder about why the ute was on the wrong side of the road, but that soon was replaced by fear and determination to protect Amy at all costs.

He spun the steering wheel sharply, and the car left the road in a spin that threw up dirt behind it. Amy called and screamed, while PJ's eyes remained narrow and attentive. As the car hit the tree, PJ blacked out momentarily.


	5. Chapter 5

**Part 5**

PJ awoke to screams at his left, and for just a second, he ignored them. Finally, he recognised the screamer as Amy, and he sat up in his seat with a start. He turned to Amy, to find her clutching at her stomach, screaming breathlessly. At times, the scream became something more of a pant, and this concerned PJ. She didn't appear injured, apart from a small cut on her arm from where the windscreen smashed.

He reached over to Amy, and pulled her into his arms. He took in what he could of the car wreck, and realised with a shock that they were lucky to even be alive. This harsh realisation was further incentive for PJ to hold Amy tighter, and he began to whisper into her ear.

"I love you, Amy…I love you more than anything…I know you'll be fine…I believe in you…I love you…" PJ whispered, as he tried to calm his racing heart. It beat wildly in his chest, fuelled mostly by the fear of losing Amy.

Amy's screams slowed as the pain began to make her delirious. All she could hear were PJ's words in her ear…words that she hadn't heard in a long time…words that she had never quite believed…but PJ made them sound so different…they actually _meant _something coming out of his mouth.

_He loves me_, Amy thought amidst her pain and panic. This realisation calmed her slightly, and sent her mind reeling. _He wants nothing from me…There is no hidden agenda…He loves me…_

PJ grabbed the radio and inspected it curiously. He wondered whether it was still working after the accident. In case it was, he began to shout desperately into it.

"Mount Thomas 500 to Mount Thomas 208…Mount Thomas…"

As PJ was about to repeat his message, he thought he could hear Joss and Kelly in the background, fighting over the radio. Their arguments had never really agitated PJ before. If anything, he had found their antics a bit of comic relief so sorely needed in Mount Thomas. But now, it was getting on his nerves. Now, when Amy's life lay on the line, they were placing a petty squabble above all else.

"Kelly!" PJ snapped. "Joss! Get an ambulance out to Penhope Road NOW or you'll lose a detective!"

The young constables appeared to have gotten the point, because it was Kelly who spoke next.

"PJ?" she asked, not at all sure of herself. "Are you okay…"

"No!" PJ snapped again, still angry and annoyed. "Just get that ambulance out here now!"

PJ put the radio down and tried to relax, or at least calm himself a little for Amy's sake.

Amy was now slipping in and out of consciousness, so she missed PJ's shouting. PJ appeared to have noticed how badly she was fairing, and was holding her tighter as a result. He appeared to be becoming desperate now…almost like the realisation that he could very well lose Amy appeared to be setting in.

"It's okay…it'll be okay…Amy…stay with me…just follow my voice…my voice will lead you home…hang onto me, Amy…" PJ said as he held her in his arms, like a child.

If Amy had been able to speak to him, she would have told him that she was holding onto him…she always had.

From the moment that her past had begun to collide with her present, she had clutched onto PJ, the kindest person she knew. She had held onto him as tightly as she could, in the hopes that by clutching to a part of her present, she could prevent herself from dissolving back into the swirling darkness that was her past.

PJ began to say silent prayers, praying that Amy would survive. As he begun his second plea to the heavens, the ambulance arrived, tailed closely by Joss and Kelly in the police car.

"They're here, Amy," he said, "they're here and they're going to take care of you. It'll all be okay…"

And as Amy listened to PJ's kind and desperate assurances, she lost consciousness.

--------------------------------------------

When Amy awoke, she was being fussed over by an ambulance officer. Amy's vision wouldn't focus properly, and nausea she had combating for days now returned. She moaned slightly as she took a rough estimate of her surroundings, and guessed that she was in an ambulance.

_Where's PJ_, Amy questioned silently. _Where's PJ?_

While Amy asked herself the same question over and over again in her mind, only one word left her lips before the sedatives the ambulance officer was giving her set in.

"PJ," she mumbled, and her world once more faded to black.

--------------------------------------------

PJ sat in the hospital waiting room, having once more assured a nurse that he was fine. They had been bugging him for the last half-hour, trying to convince him to let them check him over. Every single time, PJ refused, telling them to go save Amy.

Joss and Kelly were keeping him company…or at least sitting in the same room as him. They hadn't spoken to PJ since arriving, and in turn, PJ hadn't spoken to them. He was still fuming about their stunt over the radio. If they hadn't argued, then maybe he'd know what was wrong with Amy by now.

Kelly looked over to PJ and, gaze lowered to her shoes, spoke.

"PJ, we're sorry…" she said in a shaky voice. "If we'd known…"

PJ rose a hand, which silenced Kelly immediately.

"Stop, alright, just stop. I don't want to hear it now."

Kelly and Joss were a little taken aback by PJ's impatience, and decided to keep to themselves.

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Amy awoke in a hospital room, and the first thing she noticed was that PJ wasn't there. She groaned slightly as she tried to sit up, but her body didn't seem keen to obey. As she took in the hospital around her, she tried to remember what exactly had landed her there in the first place. After several moments of silent thought, she remembered the ute.

_Wasn't it Luke's ute_, she wondered as a doctor walked in.

The doctor was a fairly pretty female, probably mid thirties and only a couple of years older than Amy. She had waist long blonde hair that was tied back into a ponytail off her face.

"How are you feeling?" the doctor asked. Before Amy even had a chance to answer, the doctor continued. "Don't try to stress yourself…it's okay. You were in a car accident, and you're going to be fine…more than fine, actually…"

Amy's first impression of the doctor became cemented as a talkative busy-body. There was something about the doctor that distinctly annoyed Amy, but she put it out of her mind.

"Now, Amy, have you been feeling nauseous at all lately? Maybe a little sick?" the doctor, Carly, asked. The comment was very random, and that bothered Amy.

"Yeah, I suppose," Amy said with puzzlement. "What's going on?"

The doctor seemed somewhat excited. Amy just couldn't understand it at all.

"Amy…congratulations…you're going to be a mum."


	6. Chapter 6

**Part 6**

Amy's breath caught in her throat and she had to choke down overwhelming tears. The shock went through her system, and tears filled in her eyes. Her mind seemed to have stopped working, because she couldn't think at all. Even now, her breath came in ragged gasps. She remembered the night she had shared with PJ…the night that had sent their relationship onto the rocks.

_No_, she thought as her mind began to at least attempt to process the information, _no…_

"Do you want me to go get PJ? You were asking for him in the ambulance," the doctor asked, her bubbly nature still apparent. Amy didn't react and the doctor left, probably to still get PJ.

"Amy…I've been worried," PJ said as he walked in and met Amy's eyes. The first thing he noticed was the tears. "Amy…what's wrong…please, Amy…you can tell me…let me help you…"

As PJ rushed over and took her hand, Amy placed the other on her stomach. She rubbed it slowly, thinking through what she had been told.

"There's a baby inside me," Amy managed slowly and quietly, "your baby."

PJ seemed shocked, to put it lightly. He removed his hand from Amy's momentarily as he thought through the situation. He knew full well of Amy's teenage pregnancy to her uncle…he had been there when she had told John the truth.

And now, all these years later, she was pregnant again…and it was his baby.

"PJ…I heard what you said in the car…did you mean it?" Amy asked quietly. "Did you mean every word?"

PJ took Amy's hands with renewed confidence in their relationship.

"I meant it more than anything I have ever said before," he said gently, "I love you…and I will wait a million years if that's how long it will take you to be ready to take that step…every step I take, I want you next to me…and I want to be next to you. This accident has taught me one thing…and that you're the one I want to spend the rest of my life with…no matter what obstacle stands in our way."

"PJ," Amy whispered, her eyes filling with tears as she listened to his speech. It wasn't rehearsed…every word was PJ's honest feelings…he meant every word. "I don't know if I'm ready for this…"

PJ kissed each of Amy's hands, even one with tubes in it. His eyes conveyed utter honesty and love.

"Amy…I love you, and that will never change, baby or no baby. I know it will take time…and I have time. Take both of our time if you need it…I'll still be here when you are ready." PJ said, and Amy smiled. The smile remained for several moments, before it faltered. Finally, she threw herself into his arms, as she had times before, and began to cry into his chest.

_He's always there for me_, Amy thought, _no matter what, he's always there when I need him the most. PJ's the only person who has ever been there, no matter what. He's going to have a child with me…and he's still here…_


	7. Chapter 7

**Part 7**

Amy stood in the mess room, cup of coffee in hand. A week had passed since she had gotten out of hospital, and she was already back at work. The only thing that annoyed PJ about having Amy back in the station was that no one knew that she was pregnant.

PJ approached her, and Amy looked up as soon as he entered the room. She smiled at him and he pecked her on the cheek. He remained at her side for several minutes, and they enjoyed having the other there. Finally, PJ broke the silence.

"Amy," he said, obvious nervousness in his voice, "when are you going to tell the Boss?"

Amy looked down into her coffee and swirled the small amount left around the mug.

"Not yet," she answered, "as soon as he finds out, I'll be taken off all cases and confined to desk work. Even more so because of this whole Luke thing…but I have to work it out. We're so close, PJ. We know that Luke assaulted Brendan…"

"We have no proof," PJ pointed out, "just what Brendan said to you…which he later denied…"

"We know that Luke and his mother are dangerous," Amy continued, undisturbed.

"All we have are a couple of character judgements…" PJ added.

"And we know he'll get at Chloe and I if we don't back off," Amy said. "After all…Luke tried to run us off the road!"

PJ rolled his eyes and put an arm around Amy's shoulders. He hugged her slightly and their eyes met.

"We can't prove any of this." PJ told her quietly. "We have no proof, we have no confessions…just what Brendan said to you."

Amy looked back into her mug and sighed deeply. She kept thinking, knowing that there had to be a way to prove Luke guilty…and they had to find it…

Joss and Kelly chose that moment to come barging in, arguing about something or another, as they always did. Their bickering halted the second they saw Amy and PJ, and their expressions fell.

"Oh…uh…" Joss mumbled. "We'll…wait outside…"

Amy watched with puzzlement as the two constables left, and looked at PJ with confusion.

"What was that about?"

PJ shook his head, telling himself to forget about it.

"Don't worry…anyway, I agree on all those things…next thing is proving it. It'll be difficult…Luke seems good at covering his traces."

Amy leant against PJ and let him hold her. She was on the verge of tears, as she had been for days now, and she was getting sick of it.

"I'll be happy when this whole thing is over," she mumbled into his shoulder. PJ nodded, and laughed slightly, before holding her so she could see his face.

"Won't we all, Amy, won't we all."

-----------------------------------------------

Amy stood alone outside the station, letting the cool breeze blow strands of hair from her eyes. She had always seen herself as the no nonsense detective, cool in the face of evil and crime. But lately, things seemed to be taking a different turn. It felt as if she was losing her grip on the life she had worked so hard for and was melting slowly back into the past. PJ was the only thing that she had to cling to…like a life boat in a storm.

_He is the best thing that has ever come into my life_, Amy thought as she closed her eyes in an attempt to push back the tears that threatened to overwhelm her. _He's like…a light in the shadows._

"Amy," PJ whispered as he approached her slowly. Amy looked up in surprise and let her expression melt into a half-hearted smile. They stood there, facing each other, for several minutes, just letting the other's presence comfort them. Finally, he placed a hand on Amy's stomach. Amy flinched at first, but then met PJ's eyes slowly. "I love you more than anything else in this world," he said. "After Maggie…after Jo…I never thought I'd love again. It was like…I was doomed to be lonely, but then I met you…and we're going to have a baby."

Amy let the tears slide down her cheeks, no longer afraid to cry. She nodded and placed her hand on PJ's, her eyes sincere and carrying the strength that PJ loved her for.

"I love you too, PJ, but why?" she asked softly. "Why me?"

PJ pulled Amy into a hug and rested his chin on top of Amy's head, and closed his eyes gently.

"Because you're you," he said simply, and all was understood.

-----------------------------------------------

PJ walked into the CI office, and his smile faded as he saw Amy sitting at her desk, curled in a ball. Panic went through his features, and his body froze.

"What are you still doing here?" he asked. "Are you alright? Amy?"

Amy looked up, her expression grave.

"Luke is going to get Chloe. How would Brendan feel if Chloe was hurt? I know how it would feel," Amy said, placing a hand on her stomach. "Please…we have to do something…we have to protect them…"

PJ nodded without thinking, and took Amy's hands and held them tightly. He kissed both and met her eyes gently.

"Of course we will," he said in his usual strong, yet amazingly kind and compassionate tones, "but tomorrow…tonight, just relax…okay?"

Amy nodded and let PJ brush against her lips. That rush of emotions went through her, warming her to the bone. She could never explain that feeling, not even to herself. All she really knew was that she would be the happiest woman alive if she could feel that way forever.

_He's my personal rainbow_, Amy thought, and instantly liked the way it sounded. In her life, so dark…so dreary, somehow, a rainbow had appeared.


	8. Chapter 8

**Part 8**

Amy sat beside PJ as he drove his car to the station the next morning. Unbeknownst to their colleagues, they had decided that today would be the day they would nail Luke Phillips and his mother. Also, unbeknownst to their colleagues, they had spent another night together at Amy's flat.

They hadn't slept together, like that night that had changed so much for them. They had enjoyed another dinner courtesy of takeaway, before PJ had crashed on the couch. Amy hadn't slept much. She had spent a great deal of the night crouched down on the floor beside PJ, admiring him as he slept. It was foreign to Amy to have someone that she could rely on so heavily. Despite all odds, he was still beside her and caring for her. He loved her, even though she was complicating his life dramatically.

_And I love him_, Amy thought as she watched PJ turned into a parking space near the station. _And for once, that's all that matters._

The two walked in, each occasionally glancing to the other for emotional support. They both had a feeling, deep down, that this was going to be a long day. And they weren't going to be wrong.

PJ called all the uniforms together and began to tell them about his plan. Alex and Jonesy were going to go and bring Luke to the station, where they were going to hammer him until he snapped. Joss and Kelly were going to give Chloe's school a warning about Luke Phillips and his mother, while Amy and PJ were going to bring the McGuire's to the station so they could be protected. Tom, Susie and Mark would remain at the station in case of an emergency.

Amy didn't pay much attention to PJ's explanation. After all, she had heard it at least a hundred times before. She and PJ had gone over it at her place that morning, and in the car. PJ had tried to assure her that it was flawless, and that nothing could go wrong, but Amy wasn't so convinced.

PJ appeared to have noticed Amy's uncertainty, and took her hand and squeezed it tightly. His constant encouragement had became something of an inspiration for Amy. After all he had been through…after all the loss…after all the heartbreak…here he was, once again placing his heart on the line.

"Don't worry, guys," PJ said, as a general statement, but Amy knew that it was also directed at her. Just the way he glanced at her out of the corner of his eye…the hint of a smile on his face. "We'll nab this guy."

-----------------------------------------

Amy and PJ stopped outside Brendan's house, and stared at it with intense concentration. Amy finally pushed a strand of hair from her eyes and checked for her gun, which was on her belt. PJ met her gaze with caution.

"Are you sure you're ready?" he asked her.

Amy nodded and climbed out of the car.

"I'm as sure as I can be. Let's go."

PJ climbed out of the car, and followed Amy as she walked quickly across the McGuire's yard. He wasn't sure about this…not one bit. Amy was pregnant, yet she kept placing herself in these dangerous situations. There was something seriously twisted about her family.

Amy froze, her hand on the doorknob. As PJ came up behind her, he could hear the shouting that had halted Amy.

"Brendan," Amy whispered, her voice filled with horror.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" PJ asked, in a last attempt to change Amy's mind. Unfortunately, it was made up.

Amy threw open the door and charged in, gun in hand.

"Stop, Luke, it's the police!"

PJ followed Amy's inside and they looked around in absolute horror at what he saw. Blood seemed to cover every wall and every piece of furniture. Chloe and her mother, and what was perhaps one of Chloe's friends, were lying in a corner, obviously dead. Brendan was covered in blood, but both detectives knew instantly that it wasn't his own. And, over by the television set, stood Janet Phillips, Luke's mother, with gun in hand.

"Put the gun down!" PJ shouted as he trained his gun on the oversized woman. Janet's eyes were filled with rage and fury, and she moved so quickly that PJ hadn't stood a chance of moving. She dived at the male detective, knocking him to the ground. PJ attempted to throw her off, but perhaps by accident, Janet hit PJ in the head with her gun. PJ moaned as he left consciousness, eyes fixed on Amy. Amy turned with a start, lowering her gun. Her eyes clouded over with tears as she watched her beloved lie on the ground, injured.

"PJ!" she wailed, her mind spinning. Janet jumped up and aimed at her.

Amy once again rose her gun, ever so tempted to pull the trigger and end the madness. Suddenly, she cast a thought to her colleagues, who were probably all looking in the wrong places for Luke and Brendan.

"Where is he?" Amy demanded, eyes wild with a will for revenge. "Where is Luke?"

Both women kept their guns fixed, while Brendan had raced to PJ's side and was checking the detective over. He watched from Janet to Amy, before finally daring to speak.

"He's looking around the house," Brendan said, and Janet turned to him with such speed that Amy had pulled the trigger, remembering what had happened last time.

"Did I ask your opinion?" she roared. "Because I don't remember asking your opinion!"

Brendan silenced as Luke entered, knife drawn.

"There's no one else…oh, it's the detective," he mumbled, eyes blank and dull. Amy looked from Luke to Janet, unsure of which was the greater threat. She breathed heavily, her mind unable to process much of anything at the moment.

"You tried to kill me, didn't you?" Amy accused, finally just letting the words flow out her mouth as they entered her mind. "You were the one driving the car that ran us off the road. You almost killed me…almost killed PJ…You assaulted Brendan…and now you've killed my niece…that's it…I've had it."

Amy rose her gun and aimed for Luke's head. She pulled the trigger as Luke lunged for her, throwing her aim off. The bullet impacted harmlessly with the wall behind him, but Luke's shoulder hit Amy's stomach, and Amy collapsed helplessly to the ground.

Her vision began to spin, and Amy clutched desperately at her stomach, hoping to stop the pain. It ran through her body, forcing the breath from her lungs. She remembered this feeling well…

"You…bastard," Amy mumbled as she struggled to hold onto consciousness. Luke looked to his mother with pride, but she merely elbowed him in the stomach.

"You should have killed her, you moron," she cursed under her breath.

As Luke and his mother turned away from her, perhaps to speak to Brendan, Amy really couldn't tell anymore, she grabbed her radio from her hip and rolled on the floor so she was as far away from the Phillips as she could get.

"Someone," she managed in ragged gasps, "come…here…Brendan's…" Amy managed, before Janet noticed what she was doing. She walked over, exposing Brendan to Amy. He was being threatened at knife-point.

Janet looked down to her and kicked the radio out of Amy's hand. She trained her gun on Amy's chest and smirked evilly.

"I thought you were meant to be smart," she said.

Amy once more clutched her stomach, and closed her eyes tightly. She began to wait…wait for the ending she knew would come.

_It's over_, she thought sadly, _just when I work it out, it's over. Life sucks._

_-------------------------------------------------_

Meanwhile, Tom heard Amy's gasping message over the radio. Amy's voice came over in painful gasps, before a sound that could have been someone hitting the radio. He could hear someone, most likely Luke's mother, saying something about Amy's intelligence level, before a gunshot came over loud and clear. Tom began to massage the bridge of his nose before picking up the radio while Mark and Susie began to prepare themselves.

"Jones, Kirby, Peroni, O'Rourke…get to Brendan McGuire's now. Fox and Hasham are in trouble."


	9. Chapter 9

**Part 9**

Amy opened her eyes, wondering what had happened. She had heard the gunshot…but why hadn't she felt it?

For a moment, the pain that riddled her body became secondary to what she was seeing. Standing over her was PJ, who had obviously regained consciousness, and was now wrestling Janet to the floor. Janet had dropped her gun, and Amy could only presume that the bullet had been sent off course.

"PJ," she managed in a ragged gasp. "PJ…"

PJ was doing everything in his power to hold Janet off Amy. He wrapped his arms tightly around her neck, and heard her gasp for breath. The only thing that ran through PJ's mind was protecting Amy…nothing else mattered.

PJ pushed down on Janet, and his weight forced the woman onto her knees. He kept a strong, and determined expression on his face as he picked up Amy's gun which lay on the floor nearby.

Amy managed to pull herself into a sitting position, and cast Brendan and Luke a glance. They were still wrestling for the knife, and both were looking a little worse for wear.

"Don't you ever touch Amy," PJ said as he aimed Amy's gun at the back of Janet's head. "Don't you ever touch her again."

Janet almost burst into tears, when (late as always), Joss and Kelly burst through the front door.

"Police, don't move!" Joss and Kelly cried as they entered, guns drawn. Moments later, Jonesy and Alex entered the same way, with a similar cry.

"Another word, Phillips, and you're history," Tom boomed as he entered, Susie and Mark behind him. Luke was shocked so much that he dropped his knife and stood up. He turned to take off, but was pinned to the ground by Jonesy.

"Nice try, mate," Jonesy said as he put his gun away and slammed the cuffs on.

As the uniforms began to swarm around Janet, PJ lowered the gun, stood up and turned his back to her. His eyes were narrow, and his expression grave.

"Don't ever make me have to do that again," he said, before rushing over to Amy. "Amy, please speak to me."

Amy had begun to slip in and out of consciousness, and her vision was blurred. She tried to hold PJ's face, but even that seemed to be slipping away. For a moment, all the horrors that she had faced in her life seemed to be merely a dream, and she was a little kid again, innocent and naïve. She was safe again, and that's all Amy cared about.

"Amy…stay with me," PJ said as he began to kiss her gently. "You can't leave me. Not now…not when everything's so perfect."

_Perfect_, Amy thought as her eyes closed gently, _perfect…_


	10. Chapter 10

**Part 10**

PJ sat on one of the hospital beds, trying to throw the nurse off him. She kept swarming over him, trying to make sure that he wasn't hurt as a result of being hit over the head with the gun, but PJ refused to cooperate. He kept telling her to look after Amy, and tell him what was going on. Unfortunately, all the doctors were keeping very tight-lipped.

"You did a good job in there, PJ," Tom said as he entered the room, and the nurse gave up entirely. She threw her arms up in despair and left, muttering something under her breath about stupid men. PJ watched as she left, before turning his attention back to the senior sergeant.

"Thanks," he said, "but if you hadn't arrived, I probably would have ended up shooting her."

Tom smiled and sat beside PJ on the bed. PJ took in this relaxed figure, and realised that he hadn't seen this same man in a little over a year. Tom had changed after the bombing…he had become less of a father figure, and had become more bitter towards everyone, except maybe Kelly and Chris.

"Forget about it," Tom said, "those two won't be seeing the light of day for a long time. The homicide squad have moved in, and the McGuire's and the girl died at the Phillips's hands."

PJ nodded, but his expression remained grave.

"What about Amy?" he asked quietly.

Tom laughed slightly.

"You two kept it quiet…mind you I knew…I knew what I walked in on. I couldn't be happier for you, PJ." Tom said as he clapped PJ on the shoulder. PJ forced a smile for Tom's sake, and momentarily believed that this was the good old days – before the Baxters, before the Phillips…before it all. "She's a good catch…would have appreciated it if you had told me she was pregnant, though."

PJ's forced smile fell quickly as he drew in a deep breath.

"I can explain…"

"Don't," Tom said and laughed slightly. "What's done is done. However, I have had to inform the coordinator of CI at St David's. I put in a good word for both of you. It's safe to say you two can expect something in the coming weeks."

PJ nodded and smiled with relief.

"So Amy's okay?"

Tom nodded and clapped PJ on the shoulder again.

"God, yes. So is the baby…Amy was more worried about you and baby than herself, according to the doctors."

"You haven't seen her?" PJ asked with slight disappointment.

"No, but I'm going to. I won't come down hard on her, don't worry. Well…well done, Senior Detective Hasham." Tom said, standing up and drawing himself to his full height. PJ smiled broadly and nodded.

"Thankyou, Senior Sergeant Croydon," he responded and the two laughed as Tom turned to go.

Once Tom had left, PJ smiled to himself for a short while. And, for just a precious moment, he felt as though everything would be absolutely perfect.

-------------------------------------------

Amy turned her gaze from the nurse to Tom as he entered, hat in his hand. Amy's smile faded as she regarded him, and it became obvious that he knew.

"I should have told you," Amy said, "PJ kept telling me to. I'm sorry."

Tom laughed and pulled Amy into an awkward hug. Amy's eyes darted around nervously until Tom pulled away. He regarded the woman before her and sighed.

"I do believe congratulations are in order," he said, casting the slightest glance to Amy's stomach. Amy looked down and placed her hand on it.

"I suppose so," she answered, "I guess you've spoken to PJ…how is he?"

"Fine, fine…it's funny really. Both of you are more worried about the other than about yourself," Tom pointed out as he sat on the bed. "You'll make fine parents."

_Compliments from Tom Croydon_, Amy wondered silently, _something is very wrong with this picture._

Amy paused and met Tom's eyes with uncertainty.

"What about Chloe and the others?" she asked quietly. "Was it…"

"The Phillips's doing." Tom finished. "Homicide will be swarming over it for a while. The Phillips are as stubborn as ever to give out information. You and PJ did a good job with this investigation…and you handled that situation at the McGuire's very well. I've had to tell the CI coordinator at St David's about you being pregnant…but I put in a good word for you and PJ."

Amy rose an eyebrow. Finally, she shook her head.

"No," she said, "I didn't handle it well at all. Instead of being objective, I fell to pieces. Once PJ was hurt, I panicked and let my emotions take control over my mind. It's thanks to PJ's good timing that I'm still here."

"Good timing or not, they were impressed," Tom pointed out. "I'd be expecting something if I were you."

Amy sighed and glanced out into the doorway, where PJ stood, arms folded across his chest.

"Hey, PJ," she said gently as PJ entered. Tom stood up and PJ immediately took his seat. "Uh, Boss, can we have a couple of minutes?"

Tom nodded and backed out.

"Certainly," he said, closing the door gently.

Amy and PJ let their gazes meet and PJ spontaneously pulled Amy into a hug.

"Thanks…again," Amy said as she let herself become once more lost in PJ's embrace.

"Just having you here is enough," PJ whispered as he hugged Amy as tightly as he could. Out of the corner of her eye, Amy could see the tears on PJ's cheeks. She pulled away and regarded him slowly.

_I've never seen PJ cry before_, she realised.

"What's wrong?" Amy asked.

PJ laughed as he shook his head.

"Absolutely nothing's wrong. I've got everything I've ever dreamed of right here…"

Amy let her lips brush against PJ's and showed him a look of deepest sincerity.

"Ready or not, our dreams have come true."


	11. Chapter 11

**Part 11**

Amy read the report with PJ looking over her shoulder. After three weeks, the case was finally closed. Luke and Janet still had to go to trial for murder, assault and attempted murder, and PJ and Amy would have to testify, but things were looking up.

The whole case appeared to be a soap opera-like scandal, involving an affair between John and Janet just weeks before Brendan had been born. Ever since, John had been paying Janet from his own bank account so she would keep silent about the affair and Luke.

However, things had changed once Amy had gone after her uncle. He couldn't pay for Janet's silence from inside a prison cell, so he had been forced to tell Brendan about the secret half-brother. It had taken a while for Janet to realise that she wasn't going to get anymore money from John, so had arranged to meet Brendan, and when he refused to pay her, she had attacked him.

Things had gone from bad to worse from then, as Luke and Janet had tried to silence Brendan once the police had gotten involved. However, upon discovering that Amy was the one who put John behind bars, they had switched targets, leading to the car accident.

The day that Amy and PJ had decided to nail Luke Phillips had been the same day that Luke and Janet had decided to show Brendan that they meant business. Chloe, her friend and her mother had gotten in the way, and the rest had been steered heavily by Amy and PJ's arrival.

"Geez," Amy said as she read the report for the third time. "Uncle John was sicker than I thought."

PJ nodded as he draped his arms around Amy's neck.

"Yeah, bad enough he has the affair, but then he goes and lies about it to his dying wife…and then abuses you…he has some issues."

_Bad enough he did what he did to me_, Amy reflected slowly, _but he had to lie about this to Aunt Sally and Brendan as well._

"PJ," Amy said, turning to face him.

"Yeah?" PJ asked kindly. "Anything wrong?"

Amy shook her head, smiling bravely.

"No, well…actually, Brendan spoke to me on the phone the other night. He wants to go see Uncle John about what happened." Amy explained. She didn't expect PJ to take it well. She knew he would try to talk her out of it, or insist on coming along.

She got the exact reaction she had been expecting.

"And he wants you to go with him?" PJ asked, his expression blank. "What did you say?"

"I said yes." Amy answered simply.

PJ seemed surprised, to put it lightly. He drew away from her and their gazes met.

"Are you sure?" he asked with uncertainty. "Do you want me to come with you."

Amy let her expression become one of certainty and strength. She found it difficult to put it into words that anyone could understand…although she knew PJ would understand anyway. She took his hands gently and let the kindness in his eyes be her guide.

"Some day…I'll have to confront him and let him know that everything he did to me was wrong. Some day…I'll have to confront him and show him that he's not affecting my life anymore. Some day…I'll have to confront him and show him that I've moved on. When I told him about Aunt Sally…I didn't show him all of that. But today, I think I'm ready to let him see what I've become…who I've become…Thanks to you."

PJ understood every word, every emotion that Amy conveyed in her speech. It was from her heart to his, and PJ couldn't refuse. He nodded and kissed her hands gently.

"I'll be right here when you get back."

-----------------------------------

Amy tapped her fingers on the steering wheel, trying to find the words to say to Brendan. He gazed longingly out the window at the clouds, as if searching for answers that he couldn't find on this earth.

"Brendan," Amy said gently, looking over to the cousin she had so often felt like she couldn't reach. "Are you okay?"

"My wife and daughter are dead, and my dad's in prison, put there by my cousin…oh, yeah…I'm doing super." Brendan answered sarcastically. "Not to mention the half-brother I never knew I had and my father's murderous mistress."

Amy sat back. This was exactly the reaction she had expected from him. Whenever Brendan was angry, upset or both, he became quite bitter and difficult to reach.

"Hey, don't talk to me about loss. In case you can't remember, my parents died in a car crash, I was my uncle's sexual toy for four years, my cousin knew and never said, I fell pregnant to my uncle, was forced to have an abortion by my aunt, and was then thrown out of home." Amy reminded. "Then I had to pull myself out of the gutter, which was the hardest thing I ever did. When I finally decided to face the past, I started to question my own memory, and my cousin wouldn't tell the truth. He let me go on thinking I was the one in the wrong."

Amy looked over to Brendan, who was facing her with puzzlement in his eyes.

"I…never knew that happened…I was just trying to protect what I knew…I'm sorry."

She turned her eyes back to the road and switched lanes.

"It's a bit too late for sorry. I've just gotten on with my life." Amy concluded. "Even in the greatest darkness, a bright light can form. Look at me…look at PJ."

Brendan nodded, although the full meaning escaped him. Amy kept her gaze fixed on the road, but cast occasional glances in Brendan's direction.

_Maybe this is the turning point_, Amy wondered silently, _maybe this is where Brendan and I grow close. Or maybe I'm just being too optimistic._

_---------------------------------------------_

John McGuire looked up as Amy and Brendan entered, both with sombre expressions on their faces. Seeing John was a strange experience for Amy. If she had thought he had changed from when she was a teenager, then the change he had undergone in prison was just as extraordinary. He had a strange, almost hunted look in his eyes, and didn't appear as much as the gentlemen he had appeared to be earlier that year.

"Brendan," he said, smiling as his son entered. "Amy…"

Amy stood behind Brendan while he explained the whole situation to John, who watched with wide eyes. He was speechless as Brendan jumped up, eyes wild with anger.

"If you hadn't gone and screwed around behind mum's back," he accused, "then I'd still have my wife and my daughter! You ruined our family!"

Amy could sense that the officers nearby weren't very pleased with Brendan's shouting, so placed her hand on his shoulder. He was silenced immediately. Amy stepped forward and met her uncle's eyes, and easily dismissed the niggling sense of fear within her.

"I have lived most of my life in fear because of you," she said in the bravest voice she could manage. "I could never hold down a relationship with a guy, so no wonder that the only guy I dated ended up running a mile. But finally, and thanks to you, in a way, I've found the man of my dreams. We've both found happiness, and we're building a life together."

John seemed taken aback, to put it lightly. Amy placed a hand on her stomach, once again contemplating the fact that there was a little baby inside her.

"We're going to have a baby together," Amy told him. "As much as what you did to me has hindered our relationship…it's also helped us. We would not be as close as we are if it wasn't for you. However…it doesn't make what you did okay, to me or to Aunt Sally, or Brendan, or Janet. I'm moving on."

John nodded, and it hit Amy just how fragile he looked. Prison was aging him greatly, so much that it was almost impossible to recognise him anymore. He wasn't meant for prison, but he deserved every minute of it.

"Well, I've said what I wanted to say. Brendan, are you ready to go? If I'm not back by six, PJ will have a heart attack." Amy said as she turned to Brendan, with something of a smile on her face.

Brendan shot his father a look that could send a chill down your spine. John flinched, as if burned.

"Yeah," he said, "let's go."

--------------------------------------------

Amy walked into the station to find it virtually deserted. Jonesy was working late on some report, and Kelly was sorting through the lost property cage, which she was meant to have done earlier, but had put off.

In their office, PJ sat at his desk, fingers laced behind his head, eyes closed and a broad smile over his face. Amy paused at the door and noticed how happy he was.

_All his dreams are coming true_, Amy thought, after remembering what he had said at the hospital. _And so are all of mine._

She opened the door, and PJ sat forward with a start. His expression relaxed as he realised it was Amy. He rose to his feet and regarded her. He had expected her to come back inconsolable. He had expected her to come back a mess. But Amy wasn't a mess at all. She looked as strong as ever, and as happy as ever. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him on the lips.

"Amy?" PJ asked in confusion. Amy smiled as she let the feeling of bliss and wonder overwhelm her. "What happened out there?"

Amy kissed PJ again and smiled.

"I think I might have finally moved on," she said cheerfully. PJ wrapped his arms around Amy's waist and looked her in the eyes.

"And I couldn't be happier," he said.

And, with Jonesy and Kelly watching on, PJ and Amy shared another passionate kiss.


End file.
